Body Language
Body language is fascinating. People rarely recognize how much information they give off and how noticeable it is to the human eye. Even to the untrained human eye. It is said that no less that 50 percent of information on a person's character, impact and credibility is conveyed through no verbal communication.
The following list takes some common body postures and states the persons position.
Arms crossed: Defensive and cautious.
Resting chin on palm: Critical, cynical and negative towards the other person.
Dropping eyeglasses onto the lower bridge of the nose and peering over them: Causes negative reactions in others.
Slowly and deliberately taking off glasses and carefully cleaning the lens: The person wants to pause and think before raising opposition or asking for clarification.
Pinching bridge of the nose: Communicates great thought and concern.
Nose-rubbing or nose-touching: A sign of doubt, it often reveals a negative reaction.
Rubbing around ears: Performed while weighing an answer, commonly coupled with 'well, I don't know'.
Resting feet on a desk or chair: Gestures of territorial hegemony.
Swaying back: Weak ego.
Retracted shoulders: Suppressed anger.
Direct Eye Contact: Interested, likes you
Smiling Eyes: Is comfortable
Relaxed Brow: Comfortable
Limited or No Eye Contact : Lying, uninterested, too confined, uncomfortable, distracted
Tension in Brow : Confusion, tension, fear
Shoulders hunched forward : Lacking interest or feeling inferior
Rigid Body Posture : Anxious, uptight
Crossed arms : Can be just cold, protecting the body, or defensive
Tapping Fingers : Agitated, anxious, bored
Fidgeting with hands or objects (i.e., pen) : Bored or has something to say
Leaning forward : Interested
Fingers Interlocked placed behind the head leaving elbows open and armpits exposed : Very open to ideas, comfortable
Mirroring you : Likes you and wants to be friendly
Still : More interested in what you are saying than anything
Eyes open slightly more than usual: Gives people the impression that they are welcome.
Breath faster: Nervous or angry
Inhaling loudly and shortly: Wants to interrupt a speaking person
Loud sigh: Understand the thing that is being told.
Twisting the feet continuously : A person is nervous or concerned, but can also mean that a person is stressed or angry and that he don't want to show that to everybody.
Legs wide apart or Sitting straddle-legged: Shows that a person is feeling safe, and is self - confident. Can also show leadership.
A big smile that goes on longer and disappears slower.: Unreal or fake smile
Crossed legs with highest foot in the direction of the speaker.: Relaxed and self-confident and they are listening very carefully.
Rapidly nodding your head : Shows impatient and eager to add something to the conversation
Slowly nodding: Shows interest and that they are validating the comments of the interviewer, and this subtly encourages him to continue.
Dangling the loose shoe from the toes : Signals physical attraction
Rubbing your collar: Nerves
Adjusting your tie: Insecurity
Pressed Lips: Pressed lips convey disagreement and disapproval. It communicates a desire to end the discussion. A raised chin implies aggression that may be acted on if the conversation is not ended.
Pursed Lips: This is also a sign of disapproval. It indicates that the person has fixed views that cannot be changed. This usually reveals an arrogant and superficial character.
Biting the Lips: The person expresses embarrassment when he bites his lips. He also communicates a lack of self-confidence.
Reading Hand Signals:
People have been granted with two hands: the left and the right hand. The left has been dubbed as the "emotional hand" since an imaginary line can be drawn from the third finger leading directly to the heart. This is why the wedding ring is placed on this finger. The right hand, literally on the other hand. has been named the "proper hand" since it is with this hand that people communicate a blocking or stopping signal.
Open Hands: Open hands may be demonstrated by showing the palm of one's hand, especially in a conversation or an argument.. This expresses a trust in other and an interest in their opinions. It also offers an opinion and invites the sharing of the other person's view.
Covered Hands: This is expressed by raising the back of one or both hands against others. This indicates the setting up of barriers or the keeping of distance. It is an act of concealing feelings and covering insecurity
Clinging Hands: Those who cling to objects, such as handbags. files or tables. show a need for support. This action conveys confusion or insecurity. It expresses fear and difficulty in coping with the current situation.
Twisted Hands ( crossing both hands then clasping the palms together) : _Expression of a complex personality. It may indicate a difficult emotional life. The way the palms are held together conveys a need to hide something.
Clasping the hands : indicates defence.
Shrugged shoulders: You can recognize stressed shoulders by the fact that they are a bit shrugged, which does make the head look smaller. The meaning of the signal comes from crouching in dangerous situations. The meaning of this posing depends on the combination. In combination with big eyes it means that someone is concerned about something that is going to happen. In combination with a face that is turned away it means that the person wants to be left alone. An introvert person has nearly always those stressed shoulders.
Difference in level of both shoulders: By most of the people the left and the right shoulder are of the same height. When they are not, it often means that someone is doubting about what he is going to do. With this movement we simulate (unconscious) that we are weighing the possibilities. Sometimes when someone makes this movement, his head will move a little like he is looking above.
Crossed arms: There are a lot of different explanations of the meaning of crossed arms. When someone has crossed arms and he is shaking his head it means that he does not agree with you. But he can also cross his arms when he is frightened, then his arms give him some protection. Another option is that he is feeling cold and he is trying to hold his body-warmth with him. When someone is sitting in a chair with his arms crossed, it indicates that the person is relaxed.
Making a fist from your hands: A fist is a sign for aggression. It comes from hitting someone. But it is seldom used with a threatening meaning. Most of the time it is used to indicate that you are angry or irritated.
Holding the hand before the mouth: Holding a hand before your mouth means that you are hiding something. In western countries it is impolite to belch or to hiccup. So someone can hold his hand before his mouth to hide that he is hiccupping. When someone puts his hand before his mouth when he is talking it indicates that he is saying something or has said something that he did not want to say.
Making the eyes look larger: The meaning of making the eyes look larger can be that someone is astonished. In that case he opens his mouth a little. It can also mean that he is happy or that he likes the thing that is talked about. And because it means that you like something, you can use it on purpose. It pleases people when you have your eyes opened a bit further. When people open their eyes a bit further it can also mean that they are unhappily surprised. Then they will frown their eyebrows.
Raising the eyebrows: Raising the eyebrows shortly means that people are surprised. They raise their eyebrows to allow them to look better. But it can also mean that somebody is looking at you, and that he likes you.
Raised forehead: A raised forehead often means that someone is remembering something he has seen. This often happens very quickly. It can also be a sign of a certain emotion. It is a biological reflex that you raise your forehead a little when you are crying so the tears can move easier.
Pursed lips: When somebody purses his lips it means that he has to make a decision and is thinking about that. Sometimes he also moves his lips, like he is saying the possibilities. When somebody purses his lips, he often looks a bit upward.
Firm Handshake: The strong, firm handshake usually is given by a person who is sure and confident of themselves.
Weak hand shake: People who give these types of handshakes are either nervous, shy, insecure, or afraid of interaction with other people.
Cleared your throat: Nervousness.
Bitten your fingernails: Nervousness.
Wring your hands: Nervousness.
Paced the floor: Nervousness.
A person is bouncing their legs and their arms are crossed over or their torso is slumped: Closed off
Body language is fascinating. People rarely recognize how much information they give off and how noticeable it is to the human eye. Even to the untrained human eye. It is said that no less that 50 percent of information on a person's character, impact and credibility is conveyed through no verbal communication.
The following list takes some common body postures and states the persons position.
Arms crossed: Defensive and cautious.
Resting chin on palm: Critical, cynical and negative towards the other person.
Dropping eyeglasses onto the lower bridge of the nose and peering over them: Causes negative reactions in others.
Slowly and deliberately taking off glasses and carefully cleaning the lens: The person wants to pause and think before raising opposition or asking for clarification.
Pinching bridge of the nose: Communicates great thought and concern.
Nose-rubbing or nose-touching: A sign of doubt, it often reveals a negative reaction.
Rubbing around ears: Performed while weighing an answer, commonly coupled with 'well, I don't know'.
Resting feet on a desk or chair: Gestures of territorial hegemony.
Swaying back: Weak ego.
Retracted shoulders: Suppressed anger.
Direct Eye Contact: Interested, likes you
Smiling Eyes: Is comfortable
Relaxed Brow: Comfortable
Limited or No Eye Contact : Lying, uninterested, too confined, uncomfortable, distracted
Tension in Brow : Confusion, tension, fear
Shoulders hunched forward : Lacking interest or feeling inferior
Rigid Body Posture : Anxious, uptight
Crossed arms : Can be just cold, protecting the body, or defensive
Tapping Fingers : Agitated, anxious, bored
Fidgeting with hands or objects (i.e., pen) : Bored or has something to say
Leaning forward : Interested
Fingers Interlocked placed behind the head leaving elbows open and armpits exposed : Very open to ideas, comfortable
Mirroring you : Likes you and wants to be friendly
Still : More interested in what you are saying than anything
Eyes open slightly more than usual: Gives people the impression that they are welcome.
Breath faster: Nervous or angry
Inhaling loudly and shortly: Wants to interrupt a speaking person
Loud sigh: Understand the thing that is being told.
Twisting the feet continuously : A person is nervous or concerned, but can also mean that a person is stressed or angry and that he don't want to show that to everybody.
Legs wide apart or Sitting straddle-legged: Shows that a person is feeling safe, and is self - confident. Can also show leadership.
A big smile that goes on longer and disappears slower.: Unreal or fake smile
Crossed legs with highest foot in the direction of the speaker.: Relaxed and self-confident and they are listening very carefully.
Rapidly nodding your head : Shows impatient and eager to add something to the conversation
Slowly nodding: Shows interest and that they are validating the comments of the interviewer, and this subtly encourages him to continue.
Dangling the loose shoe from the toes : Signals physical attraction
Rubbing your collar: Nerves
Adjusting your tie: Insecurity
Pressed Lips: Pressed lips convey disagreement and disapproval. It communicates a desire to end the discussion. A raised chin implies aggression that may be acted on if the conversation is not ended.
Pursed Lips: This is also a sign of disapproval. It indicates that the person has fixed views that cannot be changed. This usually reveals an arrogant and superficial character.
Biting the Lips: The person expresses embarrassment when he bites his lips. He also communicates a lack of self-confidence.
Reading Hand Signals:
People have been granted with two hands: the left and the right hand. The left has been dubbed as the "emotional hand" since an imaginary line can be drawn from the third finger leading directly to the heart. This is why the wedding ring is placed on this finger. The right hand, literally on the other hand. has been named the "proper hand" since it is with this hand that people communicate a blocking or stopping signal.
Open Hands: Open hands may be demonstrated by showing the palm of one's hand, especially in a conversation or an argument.. This expresses a trust in other and an interest in their opinions. It also offers an opinion and invites the sharing of the other person's view.
Covered Hands: This is expressed by raising the back of one or both hands against others. This indicates the setting up of barriers or the keeping of distance. It is an act of concealing feelings and covering insecurity
Clinging Hands: Those who cling to objects, such as handbags. files or tables. show a need for support. This action conveys confusion or insecurity. It expresses fear and difficulty in coping with the current situation.
Twisted Hands ( crossing both hands then clasping the palms together) : _Expression of a complex personality. It may indicate a difficult emotional life. The way the palms are held together conveys a need to hide something.
Clasping the hands : indicates defence.
Shrugged shoulders: You can recognize stressed shoulders by the fact that they are a bit shrugged, which does make the head look smaller. The meaning of the signal comes from crouching in dangerous situations. The meaning of this posing depends on the combination. In combination with big eyes it means that someone is concerned about something that is going to happen. In combination with a face that is turned away it means that the person wants to be left alone. An introvert person has nearly always those stressed shoulders.
Difference in level of both shoulders: By most of the people the left and the right shoulder are of the same height. When they are not, it often means that someone is doubting about what he is going to do. With this movement we simulate (unconscious) that we are weighing the possibilities. Sometimes when someone makes this movement, his head will move a little like he is looking above.
Crossed arms: There are a lot of different explanations of the meaning of crossed arms. When someone has crossed arms and he is shaking his head it means that he does not agree with you. But he can also cross his arms when he is frightened, then his arms give him some protection. Another option is that he is feeling cold and he is trying to hold his body-warmth with him. When someone is sitting in a chair with his arms crossed, it indicates that the person is relaxed.
Making a fist from your hands: A fist is a sign for aggression. It comes from hitting someone. But it is seldom used with a threatening meaning. Most of the time it is used to indicate that you are angry or irritated.
Holding the hand before the mouth: Holding a hand before your mouth means that you are hiding something. In western countries it is impolite to belch or to hiccup. So someone can hold his hand before his mouth to hide that he is hiccupping. When someone puts his hand before his mouth when he is talking it indicates that he is saying something or has said something that he did not want to say.
Making the eyes look larger: The meaning of making the eyes look larger can be that someone is astonished. In that case he opens his mouth a little. It can also mean that he is happy or that he likes the thing that is talked about. And because it means that you like something, you can use it on purpose. It pleases people when you have your eyes opened a bit further. When people open their eyes a bit further it can also mean that they are unhappily surprised. Then they will frown their eyebrows.
Raising the eyebrows: Raising the eyebrows shortly means that people are surprised. They raise their eyebrows to allow them to look better. But it can also mean that somebody is looking at you, and that he likes you.
Raised forehead: A raised forehead often means that someone is remembering something he has seen. This often happens very quickly. It can also be a sign of a certain emotion. It is a biological reflex that you raise your forehead a little when you are crying so the tears can move easier.
Pursed lips: When somebody purses his lips it means that he has to make a decision and is thinking about that. Sometimes he also moves his lips, like he is saying the possibilities. When somebody purses his lips, he often looks a bit upward.
Firm Handshake: The strong, firm handshake usually is given by a person who is sure and confident of themselves.
Weak hand shake: People who give these types of handshakes are either nervous, shy, insecure, or afraid of interaction with other people.
Cleared your throat: Nervousness.
Bitten your fingernails: Nervousness.
Wring your hands: Nervousness.
Paced the floor: Nervousness.
A person is bouncing their legs and their arms are crossed over or their torso is slumped: Closed off
Body Language for Successfull HR
Even people, like the Prince of Wales, who are trained to deal with difficult situations can display the wrong body language when under pressure and ruin the message they hope to convey. Anna Burges-Lumsden reports on the importance of non-verbal cues.
Prince Charles' body language said it all at a photo call in Klosters on 31 March 2005. With a forced smile through gritted teeth, a defensive posture and eyes desperate to avoid contact with Fleet Street's finest, his distaste for the media could not have been clearer.
Prince William, by contrast, appeared relaxed, poised and confident of the image he was presenting. And so in one dramatic photograph the importance of body language was laid bare.
What the Prince of Wales really needs - apart from a lecture on the dangers of speaking near a microphone - is some serious body language coaching. Like thousands of other people in positions of responsibility he would benefit from expert help on non-verbal communication.
Words account for less than 10% of a message's impact. The rest comes from non-verbal cues.
According to Mike Petrook, public affairs manager of the Chartered Management Institute, 90% of the messages we convey are through body language.
He said: "Half of what we communicate is transmitted through our bodily positions and movements, so understanding physical gestures and expressions can help us work more efficiently at all levels of the workplace.
"Being aware of people's body language will help you learn more about your colleagues and how to work better with them," he said.
Mary-Louise Angoujard, CEO and founder of Rapporta, who is specialist in executive communication and body language, believes body language is only part of the whole picture.
"Non-verbal communication not only includes body language, posture, facial expressions and eye contact, but also vocal __expression, tone, pitch and pace." And she said that to communicate successfully you must "ensure congruence with your words in all these areas".
During negotiations or when you need to maintain authority in a meeting, Angoujard affirmed the importance of being clear of your objectives and the messages you want to communicate.
"Preparation is key," she said. "And gathering all facts and documentation and pre-empting all possible difficulties or concerns will ensure confidence and a feeling of positive self-control. As so much of body language is unconscious on our part, this will help to ensure your non-verbal communication sends out the right signals."
Angela Mortimer, who runs her own international recruitment consultancy, believes that maintaining good eye contact is also essential.
"People talk about eye contact and active listening, but staring someone out can be negative," she said. "You can divert your eyes when you're thinking and make eye contact again when you're talking."
When conducting interviews, Angoujard emphasised the importance of building rapport with the individual and establishing an environment where they feel at ease.
"This is the only way you will be best served in discovering their real strengths and skills and whether they will be a good match for the role and your organisation," she said.
During difficult situations such as making redundancies, Angoujard recommended greeting the employee in an appropriately pleasant but serious manner.
She said: "Welcome with a pleasant __expression, however maintain a demeanour that reflects the serious nature of the discussion and your respect for the situation and the individual."
Angoujard also stressed the importance of the environment in which the redundancy takes place. She suggested that when possible, conduct the meetings on neutral ground such as a meeting or conference room rather than someone's office, and that being seated around the corner of a round, oval or square table will be less 'confrontational' and more 'collegiate'.
Petrook warned, however, that body language is hard to fake and even someone who has developed a good understanding of the importance of gestures and gesticulations cannot completely disguise their own thoughts.
"There are some elements of behaviour that will remain controlled by the subconscious and are involuntary," he said.
Angoujard said that because so much of non-verbal communication is subliminal in nature, the best solution is to understand first your own attitudes, intentions and objectives and then speak accordingly.
This way, the messages you send involuntarily will be congruent with your conscious words, tone and gestures, she said.
"When you believe your own message, the impact is much greater and others are more likely to believe you mean what you say," Angoujard said.
Body language for tricky situations
In negotiations
Prepare well
Control environment
Offer a warm greeting
Understand your position
Have an upright, confident posture
Open body language (relaxed not stiff)
Build rapport
Maintain good eye contact - no eyeballing
Ask good quality, open questions
Speak in a clear, measured manner
Show empathy
Display controlled energy.
Avoid
Unremitting eyeball to eyeball
Ignoring members of the group
Coldness or harshness in your voice
Closed body language (arms folded, head down, avoiding eye contact).
Making redundancies
Offer a pleasant but serious greeting
Provide a round, oval or square table and sit on the corner not opposite
Use an appropriate voice tone, pitch, pace
Display open, neutral body language
Give reasonable eye contact
Present a respectful attitude
Offer empathy but stay businesslike
Provide meaningful consultations
Use a calm voice at a slow pace
Use a businesslike demeanour
Supply third-party reference facts
Don't be
Distant or intimate
Superior or inferior
Offensive or defensive
Maternal or paternal
Unfeeling
Maintain unbroken eye contact
Display overtly closed or defensive body language
Display too much joviality or friendliness
Conducting interviews
Use open body language
Present a straight, relaxed, confident posture
Maintain good eye contact so that you look pleasant and engaged
Offer a firm handshake
Show sincerity in voice tone
Speak a suitable pace
Explain expectations
Take charge
Express interest in person & their experience
Ask framed, contextualised questions
Listen attentively and nod occasionally
Don't
Give a flimsy or bone-crushing handshake
Sit across a table
Stand too close on arrival
Invade personal space
Say: "Tell me about yourself"
Even people, like the Prince of Wales, who are trained to deal with difficult situations can display the wrong body language when under pressure and ruin the message they hope to convey. Anna Burges-Lumsden reports on the importance of non-verbal cues.
Prince Charles' body language said it all at a photo call in Klosters on 31 March 2005. With a forced smile through gritted teeth, a defensive posture and eyes desperate to avoid contact with Fleet Street's finest, his distaste for the media could not have been clearer.
Prince William, by contrast, appeared relaxed, poised and confident of the image he was presenting. And so in one dramatic photograph the importance of body language was laid bare.
What the Prince of Wales really needs - apart from a lecture on the dangers of speaking near a microphone - is some serious body language coaching. Like thousands of other people in positions of responsibility he would benefit from expert help on non-verbal communication.
Words account for less than 10% of a message's impact. The rest comes from non-verbal cues.
According to Mike Petrook, public affairs manager of the Chartered Management Institute, 90% of the messages we convey are through body language.
He said: "Half of what we communicate is transmitted through our bodily positions and movements, so understanding physical gestures and expressions can help us work more efficiently at all levels of the workplace.
"Being aware of people's body language will help you learn more about your colleagues and how to work better with them," he said.
Mary-Louise Angoujard, CEO and founder of Rapporta, who is specialist in executive communication and body language, believes body language is only part of the whole picture.
"Non-verbal communication not only includes body language, posture, facial expressions and eye contact, but also vocal __expression, tone, pitch and pace." And she said that to communicate successfully you must "ensure congruence with your words in all these areas".
During negotiations or when you need to maintain authority in a meeting, Angoujard affirmed the importance of being clear of your objectives and the messages you want to communicate.
"Preparation is key," she said. "And gathering all facts and documentation and pre-empting all possible difficulties or concerns will ensure confidence and a feeling of positive self-control. As so much of body language is unconscious on our part, this will help to ensure your non-verbal communication sends out the right signals."
Angela Mortimer, who runs her own international recruitment consultancy, believes that maintaining good eye contact is also essential.
"People talk about eye contact and active listening, but staring someone out can be negative," she said. "You can divert your eyes when you're thinking and make eye contact again when you're talking."
When conducting interviews, Angoujard emphasised the importance of building rapport with the individual and establishing an environment where they feel at ease.
"This is the only way you will be best served in discovering their real strengths and skills and whether they will be a good match for the role and your organisation," she said.
During difficult situations such as making redundancies, Angoujard recommended greeting the employee in an appropriately pleasant but serious manner.
She said: "Welcome with a pleasant __expression, however maintain a demeanour that reflects the serious nature of the discussion and your respect for the situation and the individual."
Angoujard also stressed the importance of the environment in which the redundancy takes place. She suggested that when possible, conduct the meetings on neutral ground such as a meeting or conference room rather than someone's office, and that being seated around the corner of a round, oval or square table will be less 'confrontational' and more 'collegiate'.
Petrook warned, however, that body language is hard to fake and even someone who has developed a good understanding of the importance of gestures and gesticulations cannot completely disguise their own thoughts.
"There are some elements of behaviour that will remain controlled by the subconscious and are involuntary," he said.
Angoujard said that because so much of non-verbal communication is subliminal in nature, the best solution is to understand first your own attitudes, intentions and objectives and then speak accordingly.
This way, the messages you send involuntarily will be congruent with your conscious words, tone and gestures, she said.
"When you believe your own message, the impact is much greater and others are more likely to believe you mean what you say," Angoujard said.
Body language for tricky situations
In negotiations
Prepare well
Control environment
Offer a warm greeting
Understand your position
Have an upright, confident posture
Open body language (relaxed not stiff)
Build rapport
Maintain good eye contact - no eyeballing
Ask good quality, open questions
Speak in a clear, measured manner
Show empathy
Display controlled energy.
Avoid
Unremitting eyeball to eyeball
Ignoring members of the group
Coldness or harshness in your voice
Closed body language (arms folded, head down, avoiding eye contact).
Making redundancies
Offer a pleasant but serious greeting
Provide a round, oval or square table and sit on the corner not opposite
Use an appropriate voice tone, pitch, pace
Display open, neutral body language
Give reasonable eye contact
Present a respectful attitude
Offer empathy but stay businesslike
Provide meaningful consultations
Use a calm voice at a slow pace
Use a businesslike demeanour
Supply third-party reference facts
Don't be
Distant or intimate
Superior or inferior
Offensive or defensive
Maternal or paternal
Unfeeling
Maintain unbroken eye contact
Display overtly closed or defensive body language
Display too much joviality or friendliness
Conducting interviews
Use open body language
Present a straight, relaxed, confident posture
Maintain good eye contact so that you look pleasant and engaged
Offer a firm handshake
Show sincerity in voice tone
Speak a suitable pace
Explain expectations
Take charge
Express interest in person & their experience
Ask framed, contextualised questions
Listen attentively and nod occasionally
Don't
Give a flimsy or bone-crushing handshake
Sit across a table
Stand too close on arrival
Invade personal space
Say: "Tell me about yourself"
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